Dear Author (myself included)
You. Will. Fail.
I know those are three words that no author (or anyone for that matter) would ever want to hear but that is the cold, hard truth. I won’t tell you that you’re amazing or anything (but you are) but you need to know that there will be times when you won’t feel like you are so amazing. It might be a rejection letter from an agent or a publishing house or even a “we regret to inform you that…” letter from a writing contest that you entered.
You will feel crushed. You’ll doubt yourself so much to the point that the mere thought of writing a single word (even your name, I kid you not!) will give you a panic attack. That’s okay. It doesn’t mean you are terrible. failing is not something that should bring you down. It’s part of the life we live and each failure helps us grow into a better, stronger person. The most important thing that you need to remember when you’ve failed is that you should never lose sight of why you do what you do.
This epiphany for me, came at a time when I was trying to write n essay for a contest. Now, just a few months ago, I wrote an essay for another contest and I won first place. It was such an amazing thing and up to now, I still feel like I was dreaming. After that I felt like, I could write anything and it would be amazing. But then I entered another contest and I failed. And then I entered another one and I failed again. At this point my confidence began to falter. Was I not good enough any more? Am I a one-hit-wonder and that one contest that I’d won was it for me? Was that contest that I won even real? All these negative thoughts plagued my mind so much that when I tried to write another essay for yet another contest, I failed to even finish the story and I decided to just give up on it.
I talked to someone about this, how every time I tried to write, I felt this pressure that I really wanted to win like I had last time and it would quickly be followed by doubts that I could even win at all. He reminded me that its okay to fail and to feel doubt but that I was focusing on the wrong thing. When I started writing it wasn’t to win prizes. It was because I loved it and that is what I had to focus on; doing something I love whether I get anything out of it or not. He even pointed out that when I wrote the essay that eventually led to my win, I wasn’t thinking of winning at all. Heck I didn’t even think I would win anyway but I gave it my all and wrote it because I enjoyed it.
So here I am, reminding myself why I write (blogging is actually quite therapeutic) and hoping this will help a fellow author who might be in the same boat one day.
I love to write because it give’s me the opportunity to share what’s in my mind with others through the words that I write. As an introvert, saying what I feel or think is difficult but writing it gives me a joy like none i have ever known. Knowing that at the tips of my fingertips awaits whole worlds that people can explore through the words that I use to convey what I see in my mind and feel in my heart. Writing is a beautiful, magical thing and I LOVE IT!!!!